Opal

Gender: Female

Hometown: N/A

Temperament: Argumentative

Special Needs: Dual monitors, WIFI, Jolt Cola

They ask me if I have experience. Experience? I started programming in the Mesozoic Era, you know, COBOL. On Punch Cards. And these kids want to tell me how to write code?? In my day, we didn’t write code. We used toggle switches. They wouldn’t know a toggle switch from an Oldowan! They go on and on about their Twitter… Tweet! Tweet! Show me a pterodactyl. Now that’s a bird. Hey, even I might be more of a bird! And Mozilla? Open source? What is it, an herbivore or something? Sheesh.